Stronger.

I lay in bed last night with one of my best friends for hours discussing the stupid amount of control I give the male gender over my emotions. I really needed a wake up call, I needed to see things from another perpective, and I did.

Realizing you have a relationship with someone that is no longer healthy and doesn't benifit you in any way, shape or form has been something I have swept under the rug all summer. I just tried to pretend it didn't matter and I was happy. I am happy, and have had such an amazing summer, but it is now catching up to me.

Strength is something I do not have, phyiscally (gym buddies are well aware) and emtionally. My feelings get the best of me 99.9% of the time. Instances like last night where I learned something that really, really hurt me made me realize I do not need to give anyone a chunk of my emotions to play with and possibly crumble if given the oppertunity.

I need to find strength within myself and do what is best for ME, no matter what anyone else thinks. I know what I need to do, just the act of doing it is slowing me down. I'll get there.

"Eventually, everyone is going to hurt you, you just need to find the ones worth the pain."